Best The Tender Bar: Now a Major Film By J R Moehringer

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The Tender Bar: Now a Major Film-J R Moehringer

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'Highly entertaining . . . constructed as skilfully as a drink mixed by the author's Uncle Charlie' New York TimesIn the rich tradition of bestselling memoirs about self-invention, The Tender Bar is by turns riveting, moving, and achingly funny. An evocative portrait of one boy's struggle to become a man, it's also a touching depiction of how some men remain lost boys.JR Moehringer grew up listening for a voice, the voice of his missing father, a DJ who disappeared before JR spoke his first words. As a boy, JR would press his ear to a battered clock radio, straining to hear in that resonant voice the secrets of identity and masculinity. When the voice disappeared, JR found new voices in the bar on the corner. A grand old New York saloon, the bar was a sanctuary for all sorts of men -- cops and poets, actors and lawyers, gamblers and stumblebums. The flamboyant characters along the bar taught JR, tended him, and provided a kind of fatherhood by committee. Torn between his love for his mother and the lure of the bar, JR forged a boyhood somewhere in the middle. When the time came to leave home, the bar became a way station -- from JR's entrance to Yale, where he floundered as a scholarship student; to Lord & Taylor, where he spent a humbling stint peddling housewares; to the New York Times, where he became a faulty cog in a vast machine. The bar offered shelter from failure, from rejection, and eventually from reality, until at last the bar turned JR away.

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This was my second time around The Tender Bar. JR Moehringer and I are like brothers from similar, but different mothers. My father left but after we had moved to Scottsdale. We moved from an Indian Bend ranch to an apartment next to the Grand Canal and so on. Even my 6th grade picture looks like the kid on the cover only I came along ten year's earlier. The similarities are haunting; even how we both physically cried over fathers that neither of us really knew. Hell yes, I recommend this book because I know how authentic it is.
I've read this wonderful book twice. Many of us have started our adult lives working in bars and that drew me to read it the first time. I sent it to my writer/son as he started his first bartending job. And then read it again. Few books are better the second time. This one was. He speaks to all of us. Our foibles. Our short comings. Our insecurities. But mostly he speaks to the heart, about commitment, effort, failure, and over coming our own ideas of what the world has in store for us.

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